Have you ever had a moment where something you've been literally "chewing" on just suddenly clicks? A moment so profound in your own mind that you actually stop and smile?
God blessed me with such a moment this morning and I have to share it somewhere, with someone, in the hopes that maybe it's a concept that someone else has been pondering as well.
I have a habit of making my life into checklists.... do this, do that, go here. It's how I cope, how I keep it all together. And there have been moments of frustration where I've said to God, please just tell me what to do, just show me what's next on the list! I knew in my heart that this was not what God wanted from me, but for the life of me I couldn't seem to remove my faith from this perspective. I stopped myself constantly from saying to myself: Morning prayers-CHECK, Bible study homework-CHECK, Scripture memory: CHECK. That's just how my mind works.
And this morning, I realized my error. Praise the Lord, I see the Light. Faith is not a thing, Faith is a relationship. Quoting from my personal journal....
Faith is a relationship, not a checklist. It is the ultimate relationship in our lives. One that must be nurtured and cared for. It does require effort, but effort based on love, not obligation. It requires the investment of our hearts, our souls, our minds and our time. It is the ultimate relationship, the paramount, which must be placed before all others and from which will flow the grace needed in every other aspect of our lives.
My practical application of this was to look at my relationship with my husband. I do not do things for him out of obligation, I have no mental checklist. I have never once thought: Kiss good morning: CHECK, Hug in kitchen: CHECK, Offer to go to Post office: CHECK, Have heart-to-heart conversation: CHECK. I do these things because I LOVE him. I invest in our relationship, with my heart, my soul, my mind and my time. I need to give God the same love, at the very least.
I also know that this relationship is literally built on foundations that I already understand. I must learn to communicate, TO LISTEN, to respect, honor, obey. I must learn to TRUST and BELIEVE without question or fear. God desires fellowship with us... and I think I finally truly understand what the means and how the actually looks in my life!
Thank you Lord!
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