MrsMommyCEO

I promise...

to start being a better blogger! Geez, I feel like I've been posting about once a week and I swear I think about posting everyday!

It's been a rough few weeks around here, and that's what's really been keeping me away. I'm just struggling with a lack of focus and motivation in general, but I'm really making an effort to get myself back on track.

Now enough about my boring life... let's talk about scrapping! This weekend I added these three GORGEOUS kits to my wish list...

 

These are motivating me to scrap because I won't let myself buy them until I've used some of the other things in my "to scrap" folder!

La and Zoe also put out two AMAZING kits this weekend that I'm so excited to play with! First is Zoe's 2 Scoops with Robin Carlton, A little bit flirty...
   
And for all my family that might see this... the above photo is NATHAN, not Logan! LOL!

Next up is La's adorable "And I love you"...

And now I'm off to try to finally make Logan's first birthday invitations... how is my BABY going to be on year old? Where did the time go???

Don't you love it when...

You discover something "new" in digiscrapping?

I've only been scrapping since February of this year and I spend 90% of my time at the Sweet Shoppe... because it's just the best there! In the begining, I never ventured out to other stores because I found it all so overwhleming. There was SO much out there and it seemed very easy to get caught up in the buying (or more acurately the hoarding) and not actually scrap.

Now that I've been doing this for a little while, I'm more comfortable with knowing what kits appeal to me, not only visually, but as a scrapper. I've learned to stop buying everything that looks cute! So now that I'm venturing out a little more, I've found some new designers to be OBSESSED with!

First is obviously Cori Gammon... have I mentioned her enough lately? I just absolutely adore her style and the realism of all her kits. You can find her here at Scrapartist! Here's a page that I did recently with her Retro Techno...
 

I've also just stumbled on to Bren Boone (see the LO in my previous post!) and I'm just love her style. Both of these designers are a bit different from my normal style as their creations are much more on the realistic side... but I'm finding more and more that I really like exploring that side of scrapping.

So enough of my rambling! How about some new pages from that latest releases at SSD?

 
Using Punkin Picking by Traci Reed and Meghan Mullens

 
Using a Spy's Life by Christy Lyle and Fee Jardine

 
Using Unscary Tricksters by Christy Lyle and Eva Kipler

 
Using California Girls: Midwestern Farmers Daughters by Libby Weifenbach and Krystal Hartley. This LO is a two page spread using the latest SSD Cookie!

Happy Thursday everyone!

Choices

I've been thinking quite a lot about choices lately... I'm not sure why or what really got me started, but once I started thinking, I couldn't seem to stop. My issues with my anxiety center around the unknown... the future and all the things I can't control. So because those things are such stressors for me, I tend to try very hard to control the things that I can, which is not always a welcome thing for those around me.

But then I started thinking that maybe I need to work harder on controlling me and paying closer attention to my choices and their impact on my life and my anxiety. When I began that line of thinking, I really realized that I have a CHOICE every single day, who I want to be that day. Do I want to wake up and weight myself down with all the baggage from the day before, just picking back up right where I left off with the tension and the worry. Or do I want to start the day anew, let it stand on it's own and leave yesterday in the past.

It's much easier said than done of course, and for me it's impossible without my faith being hand-in-hand with it... but it feels GOOD. I woke up this morning and I felt myself being pulled down, I felt my fears about the coming day creeping up on me. I felt the tension and muscle spasms in my left arm begining again. I felt myself start to feel heavy. And something just sort of clicked in my mind and I knew that I had to make a conscious effort to rise above this or I was not going to make it through the day. So instead of wallowing in my problems and obsessing about the LONG day ahead of me... I got up, I got showered and dressed. I smiled. I used the time that I had, no matter how little that time was today... and it felt wonderful. I accomplished things today and of course they may seem like little things... like balancing my checkbook, catching up on bills and emails, and finally remembering to re-order the make-up that I've been out of for two weeks... but no matter what, it feels good to cross them off my list.

So tonight when I said my prayers, I prayed that again tomorrow I would be strong enough to get up and make the right choice again. During my anxiety struggles, I've learned to take one day at a time, one hour at a time if that's what's necessary... but the bottom line is that I have to be able to focus on the present, on the person that I am TODAY and I always have to remember that I have that choice, that only I can choose who I want to be each day.

Now, in this line of thinking, I've been kicking around for a while, doing an album for my children that is about me. Not about me personally, but about the things that I don't want to forget to tell them as they get older. This seemed like a golden opportunity to get started! The theme (or title) is "I Want You to Know" and my first page is appropriately titled choices...

 
Credits: Sweet Melody by Bren Boone, Worn Photo Overlays by Something Blue Studios, Delilah by Kristin Cronin-Barrow (alpha) and font: Susie's Hand

I have not decided yet if I will post these pages in any online galleries, because they are quite personal and that's not my normal scrapping style. I feel like maybe they are something that should just be shared with friends and family.

And to everyone out there reading (and honestly, I'm constantly surprised that I even have readers!) I have to thank you for all your support and for your friendship! It means so much to me, especially in times like this when I'm struggling, because it's wonderful to know that I'm not alone.

Could they be more different?

I sat down to scrap this afternoon and I knew that I had two kits that I wanted to use... Heart of Fall by Traci Reed and Kay Miller and the one I showed you yesterday, Sugar Maple by Cori Gammon. I've also been really pushing myself to try and break out of the pattern I seem to fall into with pages.... where they all start to look the same!

So here is one...
 

And here is the other...
  

LOL...I was looking at both of them in the gallery and I swear, if it wasn't the same baby n the photos, I don't think anyone would guess that they were by the same person. The interesting thing for me is that I like them both... one being more minimalist and simplistic and the other more element intense and layered.

I sometimes think that I'm constantly searching for my "style" or my niche with scrapping and maybe this goes to show me that I need to accept the fact that I just don't have one... and that's okay!

And now I'm off to bed... these drastic changes in temperature (from 90 to 50 here in just two days) are killing my allergies and I have a cold... AGAIN!

Such good intentions...

I sat down a few hours ago, while I was feeding Logan for bedtime and thought that my computer was running awfully slow. I decided to do a little clean up, remove some unused programs, scan disks and defrag.

And here I sit...nearly TWO HOURS LATER, waiting for the stupid defrag to finish so I can SCRAP! I was so good today too, I hardly scrapped or searched the boards all day long and by doing that, I got so much work done and I had my night all planned out. A night of relaxing and scrapping.... it's agony sitting here waiting, seriously.

While I'm waiting I can at least share with you this adorable kit by Cori Gammon, that I picked up at Scrapartist today...

How adorable is this? I cannot wait to play with it... if I ever get to USE my computer tonight!

I also finally had a chance to scrap with Libby's Kicks kit. I was SO excited when I first saw this in the store, because in the fall we eat, sleep, and breath soccer (except when football trumps it... LOL). And wouldn't you know that it POURED during my younger son's first soccer game. I ended up stuck under a pavilion with Logan and I wasn't able to take a single photo! So I had to wait until the boys had their second game to get some shots. Here's the layout that I finished today of Nathan's first game...
 

Still defragging.... GAH!

Have I bored you enough yet, with all my senseless chatter? Or are you still with me and just dying to know that today I finished three loads of laundry and folded and put away five others? How about the fact that I spent 20 minutes searching my son's drawers, only to find that he does not in fact own anything red, white, and blue and that I was going to have to get creative for Constitution day tomorrow... red collared shirt, white undershirt, and jeans should count right??? Would you be interested to know that I'm currently watching the Gilmore Girls DVD's for the hundredth time (currently on season 5) and I'm also re-reading the twilight series for the third time?

Someone remind me NEVER to clean up my computer again!

Truthful Tuesday...

Truth: Sometimes I avoid doing things that I know will help me, simply because I'm stubborn.

I wish that I were more open to asking fo help, but I'm just not. I normally wait until the very last second to ask for any kind of help, at which point I'm crumbling under stress and pressure. And the help that I need is always there, ready and willing... so why do I wait so long?

I think I want to be strong enough to not need help, but the reality of my life (and my anxiety) is that it's just not possible. I need my husband's help and support around the house, with the kids, and emotionally. I always need my mom when my anxiety starts to get the best of me. I KNOW this, yet everytime, I wait until my head is just about ready to explode.

Today I had a long talk with my DH... something that I've been putting off for about a week (for not apparent reason). And I feel better, it's like a weight is suddenly lifted off my shoulders because now he's sharing the burden and the stress with me.

Now I just need to learn my lesson... to stop being stubborn... to stop trying to be superwoman... and to just let other people in!

What a day...

Whew... if every Monday is like today, I'm not getting out of bed next week!

Today was Nathan's first day of preschool (which he LOVED!) but it wore me ragged, trying to get Wesley to the bus stop... come home and get Logan and Nathan ready to go... drive Nathan to school... Come home and rush through my normal Monday morning work, because I only had an hour... then it was back to school to get Nathan... rush home for lunch and then off to a doc's appt. By 2 pm, I was so exhausted... and I hadn't really done anything all day!

Thankfully at least through all my running around, I had the Eagles game tonight to look forward to. As soon as the boys are in bed, DH and I are going to kick back with snacks and just enjoy the game!

Since I missed Sweet Shoppe Saturday's AGAIN, because I spent 4 hours at the local YMCA for the boys soccer games and then the rest of the day got spent on housework, I have some gorgeous new releases to share....

From La and Christy Lyle... TOXIC RAINBOW
 

Another fantastic Scoop from La and KCB... BEEP BOOP
 

And the stunning Happiness from Zoe Pearn...
 

That's all for now, but I promise to be more consistent with my posting from now on!!!

Challenge Spotlight

This week I'm hosting the Slogan Challenge at SSD and I hope that you all will come and play along with me!

I chose one of my favorite slogan's, from Fisher Price... Play, Laugh, Grow and here is m layout...
 
Click image for full credits

I also have to recommend Kellie's Scrapping with the SugarBabes Challenge! I loved this one so much because I am a huge fan of Cathy Z...
 
Click image for full credits!

I've been very feeling really low on scrap mojo lately, so today I picked up a few new kits to get me moving a little bit. Hopefully I'll have new pages to share tomorrow!

Truthful Tuesday

I care too much what other people think of me.

I can admit this now and it's something that I've been working on for years... and I'm getting better. It's not nearly as paralyzing as it was in high school, but it still effects me much more than I would like.

Case in point: On Sunday we went to the Eagles game and knowing that it was going to be in the 80's, I decided to wear shorts. Just before getting out of the car, I asked m husband if he thought I looked okay, were my shorts too short... stupid of me to even ask in the first place... but I was expecting the standard, "you look fine!" and instead I got "yeah, they are really short." I almost had a heart attack, I was so self conscious and uncomfortable in that moment. I walked around for the next 15 minutes feeling like everyone was staring at me. And then I just had to make myself stop it, first because I think in part my husband was teasing me, but also because I felt fine up until I asked him for his opinion. I have to remind myself that even if other people do think something negative about me, especially if they are strangers, that it doesn't matter.

I sometimes get so wrapped up in the image of myself that I want to present to the outside world, that I start to lose who I really am. I confuse my choices and decisions with what I think others would have me do or what they would think is right.

I want to be stronger and more confident in myself. I want to be the kind of person that can be the first one on the dance floor and NOT care that everyone is watching... and yeah, I'm a LONG way from being that, but it's something to shoot for. I need to always remember that as long as I am happy with me, as long as I feel good about what my family, my friends, and God see when they look at me, then that is all that matters.

Odds and Ends...

What a weekend, I feel like I have so much to catch up on!

First... can we just stop and talk about how awesome the Eagles were on Sunday? I'm still reliving moments of the game in my mind and I'm just blown away! The experience of being there and seeing it all live, feeling the intensity and the adrenaline... it's amazing! I'm also really grateful for the time that my husband and I get to spend together, just the two of us. It's something that we don't have very much of and I think right now it's very much needed.

I also have a few new pictures to share! Wesley started school last Tuesday, and other than the exhaustion of going back, he's doing really well...

 

Nathan is also gearing up for school to start on Monday. It's so adorable, he met his teacher the other day and he keeps forgetting her name and calling her Miss Marigold, from Blue's Clue's... it's hilarious! I remind him that her name is Miss Sherri at least 10 times a day. He's very excited though, which is making me a little less nervous!

 

And then there is my little man, my sunshine, who is suddenly standing, cruising, clapping, waving, and doing so-big! I'm so proud of him! And his front teeth are FINALLY coming in, so he'll no longer be my little vampire!

 

And of course, I missed Sweet Shoppe Saturdays in all the hubbub of our first soccer games, so here are some new pages using releases from this weekend...
 
Scary Moon Cat by Lauren Grier

 
Cheeky Girl by Zoe Pearn

 
Cheeky Boy by Zoe Pearn

And now I'm off to get some sleep... or maybe watch some Monday Night Football! LOL